The issue and concern here is when they unknowingly expose themselves to risks by revealing their personal information online. It doesn’t stop there, kids like posting their photos and videos online. All these catches the eyes of the online predators who also frequents the various social networking sites seeking for some innocent prey.

It will be practically very difficult to stop children from their visiting the social networking sites. Parents can only empower themselves with the knowledge of the current trend and the practices of kids at such sites. Thereby they can take the necessary steps to ensure internet safety for kids.

***

Introduction

Children are inherently social creatures. Take one look at a playground and you’ll see young kids interacting with one another, practicing their social skills, and learning the lay of the land. So, it’s only natural that children would want to follow the popular trend of joining an online social network…right? After all, their friends are doing it.

In this article, we will explore social networking websites and how children below the required age to join are able to open accounts. We will also discuss the social networking dangers and positive effects of social networks on young children and offer helpful tips for parents who wish to guide their kids towards a safe direction.

Social Networks and Age Policies

Facebook and MySpace have clear age policies posted on their websites. So, how is it possible that so many kids under the required age are able to start accounts?

According to Pew Research Center, “More than half (55%) of online American youths ages 12-17 use online social networking sites.”[15] In the United Kingdom, 25% of children ages 8-12 have a profile page set up on Facebook, Bebo or MySpace in spite of the clear age restrictions. [16]

Upon close examination of those numbers, one can only assume that peer pressure is a significant factor, and for the twelve-year-olds in question– either the parents are lying about their child’s age, or the kids themselves are fibbing.

Possible Harmful Effects

Of course, we can all think of a few harmful effects that social networking sites may have on individuals, but let’s take a moment to review how these sites may adversely affect our kids.

Privacy – Young children are more likely to post personal information than older kids, and they don’t fully understand the possible severity and consequences of posting inappropriate photographs or videos. [3]

Exposure To Inappropriate Content – According to Norton, the keyword “sex” was the 4th top searched word in 2009 for tweens ages 8-12, and “porn” the top keyword for kids 7 and under. [11] Aside from search engines and foul language, tweens have the opportunity to come across inappropriate advertising or websites by clicking on links.

Cyber-Bullying – Tweens and children are not mature enough to withstand name-calling. In April, a New Jersey middle school principal named Anthony Orsini made national news over his plea to parents, asking them to remove their young children from Facebook. “They are simply not psychologically ready for the damage that one mean person online can cause,” he told parents via email. Orsini’s reasoning was based on several fights between students that originally began online. [5] This frightening trend is not limited to New Jersey and has cropped up in other states across the nation.

Stranger Danger – We’ve all heard the “stranger danger” saying, but the fact of the matter is that children are often threatened by people whom are actually familiar to them. That said, the Internet makes it quite easy for social networking perpetrators to pose as other people, or to leave anonymous messages. According to Pew Research Center, “32% of online teens have been contacted by someone with no connection to them or any of their friends, and 7% of online teens say they have felt scared or uncomfortable as a result of contact by an online stranger.” [15]

Cyber-Stalking – Something as innocent as posting a photograph can reveal a lot of information about your child including what their home looks like, what school they attend, or information about their friends. Cyber-stalkers and Social Networking Predators may even approach your child online and use seducing techniques to lure them into meeting face to face. Check out some effective social networking safety tips for parents on SafetyWeb’s blog.

Brain Changes – Lady Susan Greenfield, a neuroscientist and professor of synaptic pharmacology at Lincoln College, Oxford, and director of the Royal Institution, has argued that children who use social networking sites may experience a lack of attention span, a need for immediacy for stimulation, and a “shaky sense of identity.” [13] Then again, this is the same argument that naysayers made about the impact of television and entertainment over the past few decades. [10]

It’s Permanent! – Anything your child says or does online will leave a trace. Chances are, years from now, a potential employer or college will be able to do a search on your child and find his/her profile page. Read about how Facebook can kill your career on SafetyWeb’s blog .

Positive Effects

With all the criticism about kids using social networks, these types of sites can have positive effects on children as well. Social interaction of any kind provides lessons in both life and social skills, as they teach children how to build strong friendships and long-lasting relationships.

Relationship Building & Cultural Awareness – Social networks enable children to meet new friends from distant lands, helping them become more worldly and sensitive to cultural differences. Kids can also stay in touch or reunite with friends from their past who may have moved away.

Identity – Children can share their interests with others, join groups, experience a sense of independence [14], and engage in positive self-expression by personalizing profile pages and participating in discussions about topics that interest them. [9] This greatly facilitates the building of a child’s sense of identity.

Self-Esteem – In correlation with identity building, social networks can help build self-esteem and boost confidence.

Battling Depression – Danah Boyd, a Ph.D. candidate at the School of Information, University of California-Berkeley, and fellow at the Harvard University Berkman Center for Internet and Society recently told The New York Times that homosexual teens living in rural areas may use social networks to battle depression. “Thanks to such tools, many teens have chosen not to take the path of suicide, knowing that there are others like them.” [18]

The use of blogging can also be very therapeutic. A 17-year-old named Tamaryn Stevens was diagnosed with kidney disease when she was 10 and underwent transplant surgery. She logs on to a social network called Livewire every day to chat with online friends, post her thoughts and even upload original poetry. She says Livewire is “hugely beneficial… Especially the days that you feel [down] in real social situations like school and things like that. You go home and you go into Livewire and there’s people to talk to and it makes your day that much better.” [19]

Education – A 2008 study conducted by the University of Minnesota discovered that “students using social networking sites are actually practicing the kinds of 21st century skills we want them to develop to be successful today.” Those skills include developing a positive attitude towards technology and sharing creative, original content. [17] Social networks can help educate kids in more formal academic areas like science, mathematics, history and more. [1]

How To Choose A Safe Social Network

When choosing a safe social network for your child under the age of 13, it’s important to evaluate its safety and privacy policies. Ask yourself the following 7 questions:

1. How can I keep my child safe?
2. How often does the website monitor content and communication?
3. Does the site have clear safety, security and privacy policies posted online?
4. Does the site have a TRUSTe Children’s Privacy seal, an ESRB Privacy Online Program seal, or a VeriSign Secured seal visible?
5. Will my child be exposed to any inappropriate content in the form of advertising or links?
6. What will my child learn? [9]
7. Will I be notified of any dangerous activity?

Below is a list of safe social networks for children under the age of 13.

• Club Penguin – operated by Walt Disney Corporation, online gaming site
• Webkinz – a site that features virtual pet caring for kids
• Whyville – educational Internet site with games
• Kidzworld – a content-driven community for tweens
• Kidzui – a special web browser and filter to keep kids safe
• FaceChipz – a social network for kids created by parents
• Kidzrocket – a social network for pre-teens

What To Do If Your Child Joins a Social Network

In a study called “Teens Surfing the Net: How Do They Learn To Protect Their Privacy?”, researchers Deborah M Moscardelli and Catherine Liston-Heyes imply that “differences between adults and young people with regard to privacy may be due to lack of knowledge about privacy.” Their study found that parents who monitor their child’s Internet use, or those that surf the Internet with them, have teenagers with higher rates of concerns about privacy that those who do not. [20,21]

Here are some great steps to follow if your child (13+ years-old) joins a social networking Web site.

1. Discuss why they want to use a social network and what type of content they plan on adding.
2. Teach your child about online safety basics and what kind of personal information should be kept private. [8]
3. Check your child’s privacy settings to restrict access and postings. Show your child how to use these settings and explain their significance. [8]
4. Promote honesty. Try setting a good example by not lying and discuss how lying can hurt relationships and trustworthiness. [2]
5. Discuss the harmful effects of social networks with your child. Be sure they understand what expectations you have for their online behavior and what consequences they will face (both in the household and in the outside world) should they stray away from those. Remind them to only say or do things online that they are comfortable with others seeing. [8]
6. Start your own account on the same websites and let your child know you’re there. Tread carefully, however, and keep in mind that you can’t watch them 24/7, and some kids may resent your monitoring. [3]
7. Take advantage of parental control features on your computer by restricting inappropriate content.
8. Review your child’s friend list and ask questions if you see a friend unfamiliar to you.
9. Ask your child to refrain from positing photographs. Photos of children may be targets for pedophiles. If you do allow photos, be sure they don’t include any identifiable information like the exterior of your homes, as this may be a target for criminals. [4]
10. Do Facebook “reviews” with them. Log on together and review your child’s recent activity so you can show that you trust him/her but you are still their parent. [4]
11. Teach your child to trust their “uh-oh” feeling. [12] Encourage them to tell you or another reliable adult if they feel threatened or awkward because of something somebody said or did online. Do your best to collect and print any threats that occur via email, instant messages, postings, etc. If you feel that your child is in danger, report the incident to the police as well as the social networking Web site.

How To Delete Underage Accounts

• If your child is under the age of 13 and using Facebook, you may show your child how to delete his/her account by clicking this link.
• To report an underage Facebook user, fill out the appropriate form here.
• To obtain data on your child’s Facebook account, click here. You will be asked to submit a notarized statement saying you are the child’s parent or guardian.
• To delete an underage MySpace account, click here.

Important Laws

Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) www.coppa.org- This law requires websites to acquire parental consent for children under the age of 13 years old before collecting, using or disclosing personal information. [6]

The California Online Privacy Protection Act (OPPA) This California state law requires websites to post and comply with a privacy policy that can be found easily by its users. The law applies to any website that is accessible by California residents. [7]

Helpful Organizations

• Federal Trade Commission www.ftc.org
• Children’s Advertising Review Unit (CARU) www.caru.org
• National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC) www.missingkids.com or www.netsmartz.org
• i-SAFE www.i-safe.org

References

1 “How Does Social Networking Help Children (PDF)” Surf Net Parents.
2 “Why Kids Lie Age by Age” Parenting.com.
3 “How Young is Too Young for Facebook” Komando.com (1-16-10).
4 “Why Children Lie to Get a Facebook Page” Surfnetkids.com (11-25-09).
5 “Principal to parents:Take kids off Facebook” CNN.com (04-30-10).
6 “Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act” en.wikipedia.org.
7 “Online Privacy Protection Act” en.wikipedia.org.
8 “Social Networking Sites: A Parent’s Guide” FTC.gov(09-2007).
9 “How to Choose a Safe Social Network for Your Kids” Hubpages.com.
10 “Why Social Networks Are Good for the Kids” techcrunch.com (02-24-09).
11 “Kids’ Top 100 Searches of 2009” Norton Online Family.
12 “Facebook and Bebo risk ‘infantilising’ the human mind” guardian.co.uk (02-24-09).
14 “Parents balance freedom, safety on Facebook” The Atlanta Journal-Constitution (12-11-09).
15 “Pew Internet Addendum” Pew Internet.
16 “25% of 8 to 12 year olds have a social networking profile” Network World (03-31-10).
17 “Educational Benefits Of Social Networking Sites Uncovered” Science Daily (06-21-08).
18 “Is MySpace Good for Society? A Freakonomics Quorum” Freakonomics (02-15-08).
19 “The health benefits of social networking” ABC.net.au (04-30-09).
20 “Moscardelli, D.M. & Divine, R., 2007. Adolescents’ Concern for Privacy When Using the Internet: An Empirical Analysis of Predictors and Relationships With Privacy-Protecting Behaviors.” Family and Consumer Sciences Research Journal, 35(3), 232-252.
21 “Moscardelli, D.M. & Liston-Heyes, C., 2004. Teens Surfing The Net: How Do They Learn To Protect Their Privacy?” Journal of Business and Economics Research, 2(9), 43-56.

***

With the recent cases which came to light, which were in the news of how some kids ended their lives due to extreme tormenting experiences following what started with online relationships, all were at the social networking sites. But as we have seen kids socializing at the social networking sites is not all bad, in fact it can be very beneficial. The important thing is to exercise caution every step of the way. All parents have a big role in ensuring this. The very safety and security of their children depends on this, and which parents can ignore this?

Content within *** SafetyWeb.com

One of the favorite haunt of kids online is the social networking sites hence it is no surprising that online predators are there too. The online predators will approach kids for friendship by assuming an identity of someone in their age group. Once they are accepted as their online friend they will do everything to extract personal information from them. Eventually if they are successful this may turn into cyberstalking and physical stalking.

This is just one of the form of cyberstalking. And it is not only kids who are at risks here. Even adults become victims of cyberstalking.

The following is a detailed discussion on cyberstalking, prevention and tips on how to help your child.

***

Introduction

Cyberstalking refers to harassment or unwanted communication via some form of technology including computers, global positioning systems (GPS), cell phones, cameras and more. The National Center for Victims of Crime defines cyberstalking as “threatening behavior or unwanted advances directed at another using the Internet and other forms of online and computer communications.” Cyberstalkers may use email, chat rooms, message boards, discussion forums, GPS technology, listening devices, hidden cameras and more to target their victims. Cyberstalking can include harassing, threatening or obscene emails, excessive spamming, live chat harassment otherwise known as flaming, inappropriate messages on message boards or online guest books, dangerous electronic viruses sent, unsolicited email, and electronic identity theft. [1] In this article, we will further define cyberstalking and provide parents with a thorough list of warning signs. Furthermore, we will examine who is at risk for cyberstalking and what to do if you (or your child) fall victim to online harassment.

Examples of Cyberstalking

On behalf of Liz Claiborne Inc., Teenage Research Unlimited (TRU) conducted a nationwide survey in 2007 about teenage dating abuse and violence. Of 615 teens between the ages of 13 and 18, the study found that 382 were in a relationship. Of those teens in a relationship, 30% said they’ve been text messaged multiple times an hour by a partner wanting to check up on them, and 18% said their partner used a social networking site to harass them. Additionally, 17% of the teens surveyed said their partner has made them “afraid to respond to a cell phone call, email, IM or text message, and 10% said they’ve actually been threatened in calls or messages. [19] The study also concluded that one in four teens reported being text messaged by a partner every hour between 10pm and 5am, a dangerous fact that indicates the boyfriend or girlfriend is seeking “control and intimidation,” according to the study’s experts [20].

Indeed, internet stalking may take many forms, and in some cases, victims are not fully aware that what they are experiencing is, in fact, considered cyberstalking. Your child may be a victim of cyber stalking if they:

• Receive multiple emails or text messages per day.
• Receive unsolicited threatening emails and/or death threats.
• Receive electronic viruses.
• Receive extreme amounts of spamming.
• Experience sexual harassment or sexting via online posts, emails or cell phones, including posting and/or creating sexually explicit images.
• Experience online harassment or cyberbullying within online chat rooms or forum posts.
• Find their personal information like phone numbers, email addresses, and street addresses posted without their consent.
• Have an email or cell phone account that has been hacked.
• Are subscribed to pornography and unwanted advertising without their knowledge or consent. [6]

By further abusing technology, cyberstalkers may also:

• Monitor a victim’s online activities via Spyware; (Stalkers can install Spyware on a computer or cell phone without even having physical access to the device). [18]
• Track the location of the victim using GPS technology;
• Intercept phone calls or messages;
• Impersonate the victim; and
• Watch the victim through hidden cameras. [5]

Who Is At Risk?

Educating teenagers about the dangers of cyberstalking is vital because they may be at risk in college. According to a report published by the U.S. Department of Justice in 2009, “persons ages 18-19 and 20-24 years experience the highest rate of stalking. [3] A survey of 681 undergraduate college students, conducted by the Department of Human Development at Cornell University, found that 20% had been stalked or harassed by someone they had previously dated, 8% had initiated stalking or harassment, and 1% had been both a target and a stalker themselves. [2]

However, teens are also particularly susceptible to cyberstalking if they blog, according to a report presented at the American Association for the Advancement of Science. Their risk is due partially to the fact that teens who maintain online diaries offer an incredible amount of personal information to the public and, in essence, to a plethora of potential stalkers. Teen bloggers often disclose their first names (70%), age (67%), and contact information (61%), including their email addresses (44%), and instant messaging username (44%). Teen bloggers also commonly provide a link to a personal homepage (30%), and reveal their location (59%), full names (20%) and birth dates (39%). [4] One may assume that teenagers who engage in video blogging, or vlogging, are equally in danger.

Believe it or not, parents may inadvertently put their children in harm’s way when they post family photographs or videos of their children online. In an effort to share photos and videos with family members and friends, online predators and cyberstalkers may come across the media and follow the trail until they find personal information about the child including a home address or school name. Read on an article on Child’s safety on Youtube at SafetyWeb’s Parental Control blog about the risks involved with children featured on YouTube.

Something as simple as a Google search allows cyber stalkers to find out personal information about their target, including a hometown, school name, and whether or not they’ve ever been featured in a local newspaper. Cyberstalkers may also inconspicuously pose as friends in chat rooms and ask personal questions such as “What is your high school mascot?” or “What is the name of your pet?” At first glance, these questions may seem harmless, but their answers are often used for password recovery, and innocently providing this kind of information may lead to a hacked account and identity theft.

It is important to note that only a certain amount of internet stalking cases involve strangers. More often, victims are cyberstalked by familiar faces such as a bully at school or a neighbor. It is also common for cyberstalking to begin after a relationship ends; the “dumpee” becomes jealous, enraged, and begins to stalk their ex online. That said, some cases do involve strangers, and unlike traditional stalking, online harassment has no geographic limitations. The Internet has no boundaries and, therefore, cyberstalking may occur regardless of whether or not the victim and harasser are in the same location. In fact, a volunteer organization called Working to Halt Online Abuse (WHOA) released a report in 2009 which stated that only 36% of their received cases involved the victim and harasser in the same state or country. [17]

Signs Your Child is a Victim of Cyberstalking

Just as many victims of cyber stalking are not aware that they are being victimized, parents are sometimes not able to recognize the core warning signs that their child may be in trouble and in need of help. Remember that cyberstalkers, especially practiced online predators and pedophiles, know exactly how to manipulate their victims. If your child presents any of the signs listed below, it is your responsibility to investigate.

• Your child spends excessive amounts of time on the computer, especially late at night.
• Your child receives phone calls late at night, or is making calls to numbers you do not recognize.
• Your child closes windows or turns off the computer monitor when you or another parent is nearby.
• Your child is using an email address that you are not familiar with.
• Your child receives gifts, mail and packages from someone you do not know.
• Your child has become withdrawn from family, friends, school, and activities. [12]

Many victims of cyberstalking and cyber-harassment feel angry, annoyed, anxious, scared, helpless, sick, depressed, and even suicidal. [13] Victims of stalking also feel like they can never get away from the stalker and, consequently, have trouble sleeping and concentrating. Victims often believe the stalker is always watching them and may experience weight fluctuations (losing or gaining) as a result. [14]

A Pedophile’s New Playground

According to the Center for Missing and Exploited Children, 2 out of every 5 missing teenagers between 15 and 17-years-old are abducted in connection with Internet activity. [15] It is in a pedophile’s nature to lurk wherever children go, and cyberspace allows them to live out their fantasies anonymously and quietly. This anonymity allows the most dangerous of online predators to feel at ease, free of the notion that they may be caught. Pedophiles have learned how to fool their prey into thinking they are “friends,” and they often succeed in seducing, manipulating, and controlling both children and teenagers to do the unthinkable.

Television shows like CBS’ “48 Hours” and Dateline NBC’s “To Catch a Predator with Chris Hansen” have presented shocking story after story of adult pedophiles using the Internet to seek out sex with children. In many cases, the pedophile lies about their age and sends pornographic photographs to the minors. Although the aforementioned television broadcasts have brought the dangers of online pedophilia to the public’s attention, the threat persists. In June of 2010, a Nevada man was arrested for using technology to lure children. Jared Smith allegedly hacked into a Facebook account and then made sexual advances to a 14-year-old girl, posing as a friend. [10] Sadly, similar cases continue to appear all across our nation.

Cyberstalking & Social Networking Sites

The act of stalking on Facebook (otherwise known as “Facebook stalking”) includes but is not limited to continually checking someone’s profile page, adding perfect strangers as friends to get information about your love interest, logging on to your friends’ accounts to get information, and reading walls of people you don’t know. [9]

Facebook has recently made many changes to their privacy settings and, as a result, many unsuspecting users have a default setting on their account that allows “everyone” to view their photographs. Additionally, Facebook launched an application last year called Photo Stalker which allows its users to view photographs of other members which are publically available, even if they are not linked as friends. In a recent interview, the application’s developer said, “That’s what people go on Facebook for, to look at pictures of their exes. They are going to be able to spy on people, which they weren’t able to do before.” He continued, “People are just curious, stalkers, I don’t know. The name is perfect, only stalkers would want to do that.” [8]

There have been several documented cases of cyberstalking via Facebook since the social networking site’s inception. Earlier in 2010, two teenagers of Pamlico County, North Carolina were charged with cyberstalking their high school’s interim principal. The Class 2 misdemeanor charge is associated with a Facebook page which the teens allegedly set up in the victim’s name. The page included many offensive statements towards students, and the school district suffered “considerable disruption” as a result. [16] In April 2010, a 16-year-old Arkansas boy sued his mother for Facebook-stalking. The boy’s mother, Denise New, was later convicted of harassment for locking her son out of his own Facebook account, and then leaving slanderous messages, including vulgarities, on his wall. The harassment continued via cell phone messages, full of more foul language. New was ordered to pay a $435 fine plus take classes in both anger management and parenting before the judge considers whether to allow her to see her son again. [11] Read on SafetyWeb’s blog post about a cyberstalker using Facebook to stalk students at the University of Iowa.

Along with Facebook, other popular websites like Twitter have enabled cyberstalkers to see updates on their prey 24/7, and in some cases, allowing them to see their victim’s whereabouts. Recent applications that utilize global positioning software (GPS) technology, like Foursquare, make the act of finding their victims even easier. Check out dangers of GPS technology and its correlation to cyberstalking.

How To Prevent Being Cyberstalked?

There are quick and easy steps every parent should take to prevent their child from becoming a victim of cyberstalking.

Learn everything you can about the Internet and the latest trends in technology.
Monitor your child, their access to electronic communications and their activities online. An Internet monitoring software can help you with this.
Install a reliable Internet filter and enable parental controls where available.
Talk to your child about Internet safety and appropriate vs. inappropriate online behavior. Encourage your child to speak to you or another trusting adult if they experience anything uncomfortable while online.
With your child, go over their friends list. Make sure your child hasn’t accepted any friend requests from total strangers.
Check your child’s privacy settings. Limit the amount of people who can see photographs and other personal information. Every time your teenager ends a relationship, make sure the privacy settings are checked again.
Ensure your child avoids announcing his/her location via status updates of GPS-enabled applications.
When using websites like eBay or Craigslist, make sure your child never releases his/her address. Always use anonymous email addresses and if they must meet somebody for an in-person sale, agree to meet in a public place and make sure a parent or guardian is present for the meeting.
Google your child’s name. Set up a Google alert to notify you every time your child’s name appears in a blog post or online comment anywhere on the Internet. Visit Google.com/alerts and enter your child’s name as a search term to begin. [7]

What To Do if Your Child is a Victim

If your child has become a victim of cyberstalking, it is important to take one or more of the following steps:
1.    Once (and only once), contact the harasser to let him/her know that their harassment is unwarranted and must cease immediately, or you will take further legal action. You (and your child) should never respond to any communication from the stalker after.
2.    Keep a record of all the cyberstalking evidence including emails and postings in either hard-copy or digital form.
3.    Report the incident(s) to your Internet Service Provider and consider changing ISPs to stop cyberstalking.
4.    Close your child’s current email account and open a new one without using their real name. Consider using email filters to block the known person from contacting them.
5.    Contact your local police to see what additional action can be taken.
6.    Contact your local FBI Computer Crimes Unit. (A complete list can be found here).
7.    Contact online directories to remove your child from their listings if they are included.
8.    Never agree to meet with the cyberstalker to work things out in person.
9.    Never leave your computer logged in unattended.
10.    Make sure your child chooses a good account password and changes it frequently. The password should be at least 7 letters long.
11.    Review your child’s email signature to make sure it does not reveal anything personal. [1]

Helpful Resources

• Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) – http://www.fbi.gov/homepage.htm
• National Center for Missing & Exploited Children  – www.missingkids.com
• National Center for Victims of Crime – www.ncvc.org
• National Network to End Domestic Violence – www.nnedv.org
• National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline – www.loveisrespect.org
• Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention – http://ojjdp.ncjrs.gov/index.html
• Sexual Harassment Support – http://www.sexualharassmentsupport.org/AboutSHS.html
• Working to Halt Online Abuse (WHOA) – www.haltabuse.org and www.haltabuse.org/resources/laws/index.shtml to learn about state laws.

References

1. “Cyberstalking.” Canadian Resource Centre for Victims of Crime. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
2. Haugaard, JJ and Seri, LG. (2003) “Stalking and other forms of intrusive contact after the dissolution of adolescent dating or romantic relationships.” Department of Human Development, Cornell University. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
3. Baum, Katrina, Ph.D., Catalano, Shannan, Ph.D., Rand, Michael, Rose, Kristina (January 2009). “Stalking Victimization in the United States.” U.S. Department of Justice. Retrieved on June 26, 2010.
4. Huffaker, D. (2006). Teen Blogs Exposed: The Private Lives of Teens Made Public.Presented at the American Association for the Advancement ofScience (AAAS) in St. Louis, MO., February 16-19. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
5. High-Tech Stalking.” National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV)’s Safety Net: National Safe and Strategic Technology Project. Retrieved on June 24, 2010.
6. What is Cyberstalking?” (April 2, 2010). Teen Chat Decoder. Retrieved on June 26, 2010.
7. Womble, Ashley (June, 2009). “How To Stalker-Proof Yourself Online.” Cosmopolitan. Retrieved on June 25, 2010.
8. Cottingham, Rob (March 26, 2009). “Way-too-candid camera.”SocialSignal.com. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
9. Jiang, Greg (June 2, 2010). “Technology is Ruining Romance.” San Jose Mercury News. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
10. Dunn, Nick. “Man Arrested for Sexual Advances to a Minor over Facebook.” Mynews4.com. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
11. Parsons, Tom (May 27, 2010). “Mother Denise New Convicted Of Harassment For Hijacking Son’s Facebook Page.” Huffingtonpost.com. Retrieved on June 26, 2010.
12. “A Parent’s Guide to Internet Safety.” Published by the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
13. “Cyber-stalking in the Internet (and Phone, and GPS, and Digital Camera…) Age” Women’s Law Project. (June 23, 2009). Retrieved on June 25, 2010.
14. “Stalking.” The National Center for Victims of Crime. Retrieved on June 27, 2010.
15. Hagelin, Rebecca (March 2, 2010). “Shutting Out Cyberstalkers.” The Washington Times. Retrieved on June 22, 2010.
16. Oleniacz, Laura (June 18, 2010). “Cyberstalking trial continued until August.” Newbern Sun Journal. Retrieved on June 24, 2010.
17. 2009 Report. Working to Halt Online Abuse (WHOA). Retrieved on June 25, 2010.
18. “Tech Savvy Teens: Choosing Who Gets to See Your Info.” National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV)’s Safety Net: National Safe and Strategic Technology Project. Retrieved on June 26, 2010.
19. Delfiner, Rita. (February 9, 2010). “TECH Stalking: Teen Epidemic.” The New York Post. Retrieved on July 5, 2010.
20. “Technology Enables Teenage Stalking.” (February 9, 2007). Textually.org. Retrieved on July 5, 2010.

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A parent’s role in this cyber age is indeed a really challenging one. Besides providing and taking care of everything else parents must continually update themselves as to the latest happenings online and in the real world. As far as cyberstalking is concerned it is not only kids but the whole family at risks here, as anybody can be stalked. The only way to fight is educating oneself and taking the right steps always.

Content within *** SafetyWeb.com

This phase between childhood and adulthood becomes quite stressing for many teens, especially if proper support from family is not there. It’s a sad thing that many parents in spite of having been through this stage themselves are not able to guide their teens in the proper way.

In addition to this, it has come to light of many cases of teens struggling with issues which stems from social activities online. The times has really changed now, and it is a very challenging times for parents too as they have to constantly watch out for their kids.

The detailed discussions below is on teens and depression with focus on the causes and ways to help.

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Introduction & Overview

Every adult knows that adolescence can be a challenging time for even the most well adjusted individuals. Raising a teen, providing guidance and teaching your teen how to develop coping tools for traditional social issues can be a daunting task all on its own. Today, parents, guardians and caretakers of teens have the added challenge of identifying issues that stem from online social behavior.

In this article, we will explore how to identify signs that your young adult may be depressed, or in more advanced instances, may be suffering from suicidal tendencies. We will also provide you with resources to help you safely intervene and provide support to your teen.

Signs of Depression & Suicidal Tendencies

A review of multiple studies has shown that people express their depression in different ways. It may seem as though this is stating the obvious, but there has been extensive discussion in the mental health community as to whether adults and adolescents experience and communicate depression in different ways. It turns out that it is inconclusive: “Considering over a dozen studies relevant to the question, Weiss and Garber concluded that the matter remains unresolved: it is not known how depression in childhood and adolescence may differ from that in adults.”1 However, one may be able to detect depression by observing some of the classical signs of behavioral change, regardless of age.

Depression and suicidal tendencies are often preceded by changes in behavior and mood. The most easily identifiable clue may be a sudden lack of interest in activities that once brought delight or pleasure. This lack of pleasure may be a side effect of other stressors that will be discussed in the next section. Additional signs of depression include:

• Excessive crying or moodiness
• Feelings of guilt, sadness or hopelessness
• Persistent low self-esteem
• Easily irritated
• Sleep pattern changes: either sleeping too much or not sleeping enough
• Eating patterns change: not eating enough or over-eating
• Self-isolation
• Excessive Internet use or phone/texting

Signs of suicidal tendencies may be more pronounced and advanced than depressed behavior. Often times with teens, depressed behavior is a pre-cursor to suicidal behavior, especially when it is prolonged. In addition to signs of depression, suicidal behaviors and tendencies to look out for include:

• Suicide notes
• Verbal threats of suicide
• Expressing strong feeling of being “trapped”
• Saying phrases like “Everyone would be better off without me”
• Pre-occupation with death and dying
• Final arrangements such as giving away personal belongings
• Acting recklessly as if having a death wish
• Sudden change in friends and social activities
• Sudden switch from being depressed to calm and even happy
• Self-injurious behavior
• Change in music preferences (to a darker, moodier genre)

Traditional Signs of Depression

The reasons an individual may become depressed or stay depressed are as varied as personality types. Adolescence is a socially turbulent time for most individuals, and social stressors at home and school during this time period provide a foundation for the most traditional causes of depression in teens.

A sudden change in environment, like moving from one town to another, or even changing schools can cause an interruption in a teens life rhythm and result in depression. Similarly, a lack of structure or boundaries may contribute to a feeling of lack of direction or accomplishment.

Poor academic performance that may be due to an undiagnosed learning disability, or self-perception of having a low social status compared to peers are among the top causes for depression in a school environment. A loss of self-esteem resulting from a turbulent family environment, or a humiliating experience may also cause an episode of depression.

Technology has its benefits of making communication and research easier, but these advantages bring with them a unique set of challenges and additional social pressures for teens. In addition to traditional causes of depression, there may be events that precipitate from online (also referred to as “cyber” or “virtual”) social situations.

Causes For Depression Rooted in Cyber-Issues

There are a multitude of social networking sites available for individuals to express their creativity and personalities. Sites like Facebook and MySpace allow teens to keep in contact with each other, but also open teens up to criticism and cyber-bullying. The first widely publicized case of teen suicide resulting from cyber-bullying revealed that the ‘bully’ was the parent of a schoolmate of the girl. The case resulted in the passage of the first law making cyber-bullying a crime.

Research has shown that depression stemming from Internet use or dependency strikes higher in younger age groups. Is it not clear whether depression causes increased Internet use, or if increased Internet use results in depression.

While cyber-bullying tops the list for depression issues stemming from the Internet, there are multiple other causes including cyber-stalking, sexting, and gaming addiction. Clues to these dysfunctions present themselves similarly; while visits to the Internet may be for different reasons or to different sites, the behavior exhibits as excessive use.

Ways You Can Help

The best thing to do to avert major depression with your teen whether it be from traditional causes or causes rooted in cyber issues, is to keep the lines of communication open. Between demanding work schedules and extracurricular activities, it can be challenging to spend time with your teen. But it is important to make time and stay in contact with your teen so that you know what is going on in their lives and be able to detect negative changes.

It is important to educate your child about how to properly use technology and balance virtual activities with everyday life. Sharing this kind of information early when your child is younger as they are learning to utilize technology will help prepare them for interacting in the virtual world.

Talk with your teen if you suspect depressive behavior. Remember that being supportive, and listening (without lecturing), and understanding are important ways of encouraging your teen to share their feelings. If your teen opens up to you about the issues, respect their privacy as much as possible unless the situation is dire, in which case you should seek immediate help.

When To Get External Help

Knowing when to intervene when your child is depressed can be a sensitive situation. If you child is persistently exhibiting any of the behaviors discussed above, you should take action. Initiating a conversation with your teen is the best approach. If this approach is not successful, you may consider a visit to your family doctor, professional therapist, or spiritual/religious leader.

External Resources and Online Resources

• Net Addiction – www.netaddiction.com
• Webmd – www.webmd.com/depression/guide/teen-depression
• Psych Central – www.psychcentral.com/lib/2007/teenage-depression
• American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry – www.aacap.org/cs/root/facts_for_families/where_to_find_help_for_your_child
• Troubled Teens – www.4troubledteens.com
• Your Child’s school counselor or psychiatrist
• Your spiritual/religious leader

References

1. “Depression: Causes and Treatment”, Second Edition, Aaron T. Beck, M.D. and Brad A. Alford, Ph.D.,2009
2. “Depression Guide: Teen Depression” WebMD
3. “Teen’s Suicide Spurs Anti-Cyberbullying Law” NewsFactor, Frederick Lane. November 24, 2007
4. “Internet addiction’ Linked to Depression Says Study” Mail Online, Jenny Hope. February 3, 2010
5. “HelpGuide Teen Depression: A Guide for Parents and Teachers” HelpGuide.org

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We have seen from the above how the cyber age has brought about a change in the role of parents in parenting today. No longer can a parent have a casual attitude towards this. What a child experiences during his or her childhood and also during the transition period shapes his or her personality in such a way that it affects his/her future and whole life ahead. There is enough evidence that many disturbed adults had a very difficult childhood, likewise many healthy and well balanced adults had very good childhood experiences with very supportive parents.

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Considering this possibility it is alarming the way kids go about taking videos of themselves and uploading them for everyone to see. And a more alarming fact is the possibility of videos of children taken without their knowledge and misused online.

Children of this present generation must be taught and guided in the right way on the issues and risks of sharing videos online, for which all parents has a big responsibility of guiding them. Presented below a study of the trend around video sharing, the possible negative effects and ways to help children.

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Definition & Background

Video sharing is the act of recording video and uploading it on a website that allows others to view it.  Video may also be shared by sending it to others via email or cell phone.

Popular Uses and Applications of Video Sharing

Video hosting websites have enabled organizations like non-profits and educational institutions spread the word of their missions and gain momentum to support some very worthy causes.  It allows people to easily distribute their message to a large audience and adds a personal touch while saving both time and money.

Sharing videos for social purposes has proven to be as popular, if not more popular than sharing videos for business purposes.  Individuals may upload videos for reasons ranging from voicing their opinions on a vlog (video blog) to sharing the personal statement section of their college entrance application to showcasing a talent.

Data and Research

Over the last five years, there has been extensive research about the uses of video sharing on websites and cellular phones among different demographic groups. A study released in April, 2010 about sharing videos via cell phones shows “an interesting counter-trend, with more 12-13 year-olds sending/receiving video than those 14 and older (41% vs. 27%).” 1 The graph below summarizes the full spectrum of photo and video usage for cell phones:

The comfort level and higher frequency of sending and receiving video can be a cause for alarm to parents, and should be.  The content and subject matter of their videos is most likely harmless – forwarding popular funny videos from the Internet, like the sneezing panda.  Many parents are concerned about how easy it is for their children to acquire and/or use video technology.  Webcams are affordable and easily accessible, and many laptops on the market today come equipped with a built-in webcam.

Harmful Effects?

Technological advances have allowed the average consumer to acquire discreet video recording devices, and the proliferation of video capabilities on laptops (webcams and built-in webcams on laptops) and cell phones means that anyone of our children or anyone of us for that matter could potentially be recorded on video at anytime without our knowledge. With children in particular, a silly moment at a party during which they may exercise bad judgment (or no judgment) may be caught on camera by a friend and live forever on video.  One child may send the silly video to another on a cell phone, or by email, and if interest is high enough, a video can go ‘viral’ within hours and cause potential emotional scarring for the subject of the video.  The fact that “57% of [adult] internet users have watched videos online and most of them share what they watch with others,”2 shows an increasing trend that a video posted or shared will not only be viewed, but passed along to others.

An issue that is just as plausible as a child being videotaped without their knowledge is the child who purposefully creates their own video and sends it to one person.  In this case, the most frequent cause for concern is if they are in a relationship, and an intimate video is created to share with their mate.  The danger in this situation is when the two break-up, and if it is an unpleasant parting, one half of the couple has fuel to embarrass the other.  Unfortunately, the likelihood of this scenario is more and more likely, as according to a survey conducted by The National Campaign, “22% of teen girls and 18% of teen boys have sent or posted nude or semi-nude pictures or video of themselves.”3 Another popular scenario becoming more common-place is that of teens ‘sexting’ – sending sexually explicit text messages, or partial or fully nude pictures of themselves – to someone as a way to flirt.  Read about and discuss sexting here on the SafetyWeb blog.

The creation of user-generated videos and sending or posting such private content is treated different generationally.4 An article published by CNET News describes the ‘Naked Generation’, and the ease with which twenty-somethings post personal information about themselves, their relationships, and their partners.  They are a generation living online.  Our children witness the actions of the generation just preceding theirs and are desensitized to ‘private’ information being shared publicly, and further blur the line themselves.  The consequences of actions taken in a passionate moment are not considered until it is too late.

The effects on an individual as the result of a video being distributed without permission can be devastating, far-reaching and long lasting.  Obvious immediate effects are loss of self-esteem, embarrassment, loss of friends and social alienation, which can lead to depression and other emotional issues.  Longer-lasting effects can range from losing candidacy for a job or becoming ineligible to matriculate at an institute of higher learning.  In a nutshell, some of life’s milestone moments for a young adult may be ruined because of a decision they made as a young child or teen.

Another Pitfall to Consider about Children and Video Sharing

It is important to speak to your child about the responsible use of video on their cell phones and email accounts.  Some states have amended laws about distribution of child pornography to include forwarding video via cell phone and electronic mail, or sexting.   Some states are charging participants with felony counts and they are required to register on the sex offender list, which can affect them for life. In some cases, it is not clear if the age of the distributor is taken into consideration.  Parents should take every opportunity to speak to their children and educate them about this danger.  Discuss this issue on the SafetyWeb blog here.  If your child receives a video that shows partial or full nudity of one of their classmates or friends, they should delete it immediately and never forward it to anyone else.

Know Your Video Sites – and Their Terms of Service

There is a proliferation of video sharing sites on the Internet.  Because the sites have different offerings and goals, the terms of service for the sites vary.  Some of the most popular sites include:  Photobucket, Flickr, MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Yahoo! Video, Google Video, Metacafe, Revver and Blip.tv.

A few bloggers have explored the differences between some of the terms of so that users have a better understanding of important issues like intellectual property, and privacy rights.  A brief article comparing terms of service agreements for several different video-hosting sites can be read by clicking here.  Wikipedia also has a page called Comparison of Video Services which offers a very inclusive list of video hosting sites, and some profile information about those sites, including their terms of service.

Ways You Can Help

Opening up the lines of communication and talking to your child is the best way to prepare them to use video technology responsibly.  Teach your child that if they feel uncomfortable posing for a photo or video, it probably isn’t the best thing to do, and that they can stop at any time. Tell them it is okay to ask you if they receive a message and they are unsure if it is a ‘good’ message or a ‘bad’ message.  Spend time with your child so that they are able develop their own judgment and readily identify good and bad images and videos. Teach them to trust their judgment, delete the bad images, and tell you if they are really offensive or potentially dangerous.

External Resources and Online Resources

• CommonSense Media – http://www.commonsensemedia.org/talking-about-sexting
• American Academy of Pediatrics – http://www.aap.org/advocacy/releases/june09socialmedia.htm
• MomLogic – http://www.momlogic.com/2010/02/talk_about_sexting_with_your_kids_teens.php
• ABC Good Morning America – http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Parenting/truth-teens-sexting/story?id=7337547
• American Medical Network – http://www.health.am/ab/more/talking-to-kids-about-sexting-internet-use/

References

1. Rainie, Lee. Use of cell phone for pictures and video popular across all age groups. Pew Internet & American Life Project, April 20, 2010 http://www.pewinternet.org/Infographics/2010/Use-of-cell-phone-for-picture-and-video-by-age.aspx, accessed on May 20, 2010.
2. Madden, Mary. Online Video. Pew Internet & American Life Project, July 25, 2007, http://www.pewinternet.org/~/media//Files/Reports/2007/PIP_Online_Video_2007.pdf, accessed on May 20, 2010
3. The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. http://www.thenationalcampaign.org/sextech/PDF/SexTech_Summary.pdf, accessed on May 20, 2010
4. McCarthy, Caroline.  Welcome to the Naked Generation. CNET News, September 21, 2007 http://news.cnet.com/8301-13577_3-9782224-36.html, accessed on May 20, 2010

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There is no sign of decline but only an increase of videos uploaded on the internet at the popular video sharing sites. Well,not all videos are bad, there are really good and useful ones. There are useful tutorial videos for almost any tasks available. Ultimately it is one of the tools and it can be put to good use or bade use. Children needs to be taught about the right way.

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What is happening is that kids who usually found it difficult to cope and keep up with the demands of the real world suddenly found themselves in a new world when they came online, where they found that suddenly they can fulfill a lot of their desires and wants, live out their dreams and so on. Over a period of time they become so dependent on it that they are unable to free themselves from it.

Presented below a detailed study going through which you will gain invaluable knowledge on internet addiction and what is happening to kids.

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Definition & Background

An Internet addiction is an addiction like any other: it is defined by a compulsive loss of impulse control resulting in damage to the user and his or her relationships, schoolwork, or employment. Online gaming, compulsive use of social networking, and marathon Internet surfing sessions are all included in this powerful addition. Symptoms are comparable to other behavior addictions, most similar to pathological gambling. Because Internet addiction is relatively new to society, there is less research on it than more established addictions, such as drug and alcohol abuse. However, researchers believe that like other additions, it often masks other problems such as depression, low self-esteem, social anxiety and may even stand in a surrogate for other addictions.

Internet Addiction Statistics

Nearly every study performed on the topic has found not only a direct correlation between age and Internet addiction, but also one between age and neglect of work. That is to say that teenagers and young adults are more likely to be addicted to the Internet than any other age group, and among all people suffering from this addiction, teenagers and young adults are more likely to neglect work (school or employment) than older adults with similar addictive behavior. In fact, in the most widely recognized study of its kind, age was the only factor that was a direct and constant contributor to this addiction across all other factors.[1]

While this may be good news, suggesting that teenagers and young adults might grow out of their addiction (or reduce their intake) as they age, because this is a new “genre” of behavior, this data might simply reveal that teenagers and young adults are “early adapters.” What this means, essentially, is that they may have found this addiction before the rest of the population. If this is the case, today’s Internet-Addicted teenagers and young adults may carry it with them into adulthood. In fact, Stanford University’s School of Medicine found that nearly one in eight Americans suffers from at least one sign of problematic Internet abuse (although this does not in and of itself constitute addiction).[2]

Internet abuse is so widespread that the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistic Manual of Mental Disorders), which is published by the American Psychiatric Association, is reported to be considering adding it to its next release, alongside such issues as bipolar disorder, schizophrenia and borderline personality disorders.[3]

Indeed, as children and teenagers are still developing their brains, they may grow accustomed to the speed and flashy graphics associated with the Internet and actually adapt their physiology, developing problems such as ADHD, and becoming generally more impatient than people raised without the instant gratification offered by the Internet.

Harmful Effects

One aspect of Internet addiction, which is statistically slanted toward boys and men, is online gaming. According to Professor Mark Griffiths, a Psychologist at Nottingham Trent University in the UK, “Online gaming addiction… is a real phenomenon and people suffer the same symptoms as traditional addictions.” In one of his surveys, he found users who played online video games for over 80 hours per week, an amount he called, “excessive.”

Griffiths was asked to comment upon reports that a young man had died of heart failure after playing video games for 50 straight hours, with only a few brief breaks for the restroom. The young man in question had been recently fired from his job, due to his inability to tear himself away from his online games. According to Professor Griffiths, “[The games] completely engross the player. They are not games that you can play for 20 minutes and stop.”[4]

For many, time spent on social media sites such as MySpace and Facebook, has the same deleterious effect on a user’s ability to simply stop. According to Dr. Kimberly Young, Director of the Center for Internet Addiction Recovery in Bradford, PA, many teenagers have come to recognize on their own that their Facebook behavior is hurting their grades, college applications, and social life. However, she warns that withdrawal is difficult as well: “It’s like an eating disorder. You can’t eliminate food. You just have to make better choices about what you eat… and what you do online.”

Nonetheless, for many, the addiction is highly emotional, especially for those unsure of their place in the world or just in their social circles. As Rachel Simmons, an educator who wrote “The Curse of the Good Girl: Raising Authentic Girls with Courage and Confidence” explained, “You’re getting a feed of everything everyone is doing and saying… You’re literally watching the social landscape on the screen, and if you’re obsessed with your position in that landscape, it’s very hard to look away.”

That said, many teens have come up with their own coping strategies, such as deactivating their accounts, or giving a trusted friend or sibling a password, and only allowing themselves access once in a while. Others are entering into social pacts with friends to not use the site. [5]

In addition to the psychological, physiological, social, and mental health problems associated with Internet Addiction, children and teenagers who spend too many hours online are simply not exercising their minds and bodies at a crucial time in their lives, when they should be engaging in sports and other age-appropriate physical activities with like-minded peers.

Recognizing Computer Addiction Symptoms in Your Teen

While cause and effect is still being established, researchers have known for at least 14 years that heavy Internet users risk losing a significant other, job, school, or career opportunity because they prefer spending time on the Internet to more social interaction. According to one self test available (see: External Resources), symptoms of Internet Addiction include:

• Failed attempts to control behavior
• A heightened sense of euphoria while involved in computer and Internet activities
• Neglecting friends and family
• Neglecting sleep to stay online
• Being dishonest with others
• Feeling guilty, ashamed, anxious, or depressed as a result of online behavior
• Physical changes such as weight gain or loss, backaches, headaches, or carpal tunnel syndrome, and
• Withdrawing from other pleasurable activities

Helping Your Child Overcome an Online Addiction

As with any withdrawal, weaning your child off the Internet will be painful for him or her – and as you might imagine, your teen might make it as difficult as possible for you, in an attempt to dissuade you from trying to change his or her behavior. Start by limiting the amount of time your child spends online. If he or she is accustomed to spending eight hours per weeknight on the Internet, try limiting use in the first week to six hours per night and working steadily down. Encourage your teen to go to social events and plan play dates for your younger children.

If you, yourself, spend too much time on the Internet, this can be a great opportunity to introduce family outings and activities. Read to your younger children instead of letting them idle away on the Internet. If forcing your child to stop abusing their time on the Internet causes serious distress, take them to a licensed therapist. They may well be suffering from other emotional problems which their Internet use has masked. But mostly, remember that of all the addictions out there, an Internet Addiction is not the worst, and with love and attention from you, your child can and will learn to disengage – even if it takes some time.

References

1. “The Psychometric Properties of the Internet Addiction Test”. CyberPsychology & Behavior Volume 7, Number 4, Page 449. Laura Widyanto, Ph.D. and Mary McMurran, Ph.D. 2004.
2. Net Addiction – http://www.netaddiction.com
3. “Issues for DSM-V: Internet Addiction”. Jerald J. Block, M.D. American Psychiatric Association. March 2008. http://ajp.psychiatryonline.org/cgi/content/full/165/3/306?nl_id=1195
4. “S Korean dies after games session”. BBC News. 10 August 2005. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/technology/4137782.stm
5. “To Deal With Obsession, Some Defriend Facebook”. Katie Hafner. The New York Times. 21 December, 2009. http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/21/technology/Internet/

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Computers and internet, they are amazing and wonderful tools but uncontrolled use bring about a negative effect. Just like anything excessive is not good so is the case in the usage of the internet too. In this cyber age all parents must know about this and keep a close watch on their children for any type of behavior exhibiting symptoms of addiction to internet. Then only will they be able to detect it on time. Like other types of addiction, if it is detected early it becomes easier to help the child.

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Well of course unless somebody tells you about the risks involved you wouldn’t know this,  but the possibilities of the uploaded photos and videos in the wrong hands are literally limitless. Can you imagine the photos of your child on an adult site where people can vote and comment about it? And do you know that with the capabilities of the latest image editor programs it is just a matter of a few clicks and the image can be altered completely?

I am sure you now see all this in a new light now? Well, today let’s learn about online photos and videos, some alarming research findings on this, and the risks involved.

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Definition & Background

Online photos and videos are media produced in digital form and made available on the Internet via websites, blogs, social networking sites, photo/video sharing sites, or email.  The key difference between online media and offline media is that online media can be easily copied, shared, and downloaded.

There are two types of online photos and videos with which you as a parent need to concern yourself:

1. Inappropriate content your child may be viewing, including pornography, violence, foul language and gestures, and material that is simply not age appropriate.
2. Photos and videos featuring your child, posted either by your child or by someone else (including members of your family).

Similarities and Differences to Offline / Non-Digital Media

As with regular videos and pictures, digital media can range from completely innocuous to wildly inappropriate, depending on what is captured.  However, the digital nature of media today can create issues:

1. It can be digitally altered to suggest that your child has participated in an unsavory activity – or in a worst-case scenario, in a pornographic situation.
2. It can be spread virally – a term used to describe the way information or media is disseminated from one person to many – and be easily shared with unintended recipients.

Data and Research

In 2006, 34% of children aged 10 – 17 responded in a national survey that they had inadvertently viewed unsolicited sexual content. (This does not take into account those who were pleased to see, or or even sought out, such material.) Four percent of the respondents aged 10 – 17 had received direct solicitations for sexually explicit or nude photographs. In that same year, 61% of teenagers aged 13 – 17 reported that they had a social networking page or a personal blog, with 37% of those teens saying they were unconcerned with what strangers might do with such information.[1]

Mitigating Harm from External Sources

Some parents seek to reduce exposure to or sharing of unwanted media is through the use of internet filtering software at the home.  While this may help with part of the problem, blocking only works on a computer-by-computer basis; it is not effective on mobile devices and other computers children may have access to.  Further, blocking may:

1. Give parents the misguided perception that the risk of exposure related to viewing and sharing questionable media online has been averted.  At best it may only be mildly mitigated from the home.
2. Contribute to an adversarial and/or dishonest relationship between parents and children.
3. Hinder open communication between parents and children, which is proven to be the most important aspect of of keeping your children safe both online and off.

As for the problem of children publishing too much written or visual information, the best solution is to discuss with your children the potential repercussions of sharing such information, and to monitor their activity so that you know what they’re doing online.

Although this may make some parents uneasy, protecting your children is your obligation, and direct communication doesn’t always reveal the most accurate information.  Consider that roughly 75% of parents whose children, age nine and older, use the Internet at home reported that they know “a lot” about how their kids spend time online, while 33% of teenagers aged 13 – 17 said that their parents knew very little about what they did online.[2]

Just as you wouldn’t allow your child to spend time elsewhere without you knowing where they are and what they’re doing, so too should the same rules be applied to the Internet, especially with respect to the availability of violent and sexually explicit photographs and videos which propagate the Internet with alarming ease.

The Risks of Posting Photos and Videos Online

You and your child must both be aware that any video or photo posted on the Internet may be copied and used for nefarious purposes.  Consider the case of Jenni Brennan, who maintained a family blog, happily recording her thriving sons, Jacob and Josh.  In August 2009, she received an email from a woman she had never met, saying that she had viewed an advertisement featuring Brennan’s nine-month-old son, Jacob, which stated that he was available for adoption.[3]

Another mother, Jessica Gwozdz, found her four year old daughter’s image on a Brazilian social networking site where participants could vote on how “sexy” she was.  This photo was taken from a free photo sharing site, which had been used by the family to share up-to-date pictures with relatives.[4]

Further, many (if not most) universities and companies will conduct online searches for new applicants.  Any information or content about your child that is publicly posted or shared online will be searchable and discoverable.  Needless to say, any questionable content will only go to hinder their chances of getting into a school or landing a job.

Just as photos can be taken from blogs and photo sharing sites and used elsewhere, a video uploaded to YouTube or Google Video can be replicated and viewed millions of times by complete strangers.  Moreover, while you might have control of the photos and videos you personally post, controlling or removing copied images and videos is a nearly impossible task.

Safely Sharing Media

The safest way to ensure that family photos stay private is to only post them on a password-protected site.  Whether you opt for a blog or a picture sharing site, you can create a login and password that users must have in order to gain access.  You can give everyone the same username and password, which can help with technology-averse relatives and friends.

As to what your children may post, establish ground rules and stick to them.  Keep their social networking pages viewable to friends-only, and monitor what photos and videos they post.  Take down any images you are not expressly comfortable with, such as pictures of them in a bathing suit.  You may chose also to engage the parents of your child’s friends, as you also want to be cognizant of images and videos being posted by others.  If all the parents in your community are involved in keeping their child’s network free of content that might be tempting to an ill-meaning individual, all the children, and the community as a whole, will be safer.

Managing Problematic Media

If you are unable to engage your fellow parents in actively controlling the content posted by their children, take the time to visit your child’s friends’ pages and see if you find media with your child in it.  Should something unseemly involving your child be posted online, don’t be afraid to ask the parents of the child who posted the content to ensure that all content feature your child be removed. If you find that a video of your child has been posted to YouTube or another video-sharing site, first check to see if there are multiple copies, and then contact the service and ask them to take down those videos.  Most content-related web sites have well-defined terms of use and privacy policies and will respond to such “takedown” requests.

If a photo or video involving your child appears provocative in any way, in addition to taking the aforementioned steps, immediately contact your local police department, as there are laws specifically geared toward dealing with this problem.  Likewise, if someone has stolen your photos and is using them for illegal purposes – such as the adoption scam – ask the police how they can help.

File Types

If you decide to search your home computer to look for media files your children may have downloaded from the Internet or from a digital camera, you can run a search by file type. Common media file types are .jpg, .jpeg, .png, .bmp, .gif and .psd for photos, and .avi, .mpeg, .mpg, .mp4 and .mov for online videos.

References

1. Online Victimization of Youth: Five Years Later (2006). National Center for Missing & Exploited Children and Cox Communications, 2006.  Retrieved 11-18-2009.
2. Internet Filters Tips.  Common Sense Media, 2009.   Retrieved 11-18-2009.
3. Netter, Sarah.  Mother Horrified Son’s Picture Was Used in Scam on Craigslist.  ABC News, August 4, 2009. Retrieved 11-18-2009.
4. Quenqua, Douglas.  Guardians of Their Smiles.  New York Times, October 23, 2009. Retrieved 11-18-2009.

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Kids frequenting the social networking sites have their own online profiles and they naturally like to flaunt a ‘cool’ profile complete with their photos and videos even. Now that you know the high risks involved you are in a position to advice your kids against such activities. Ensuring internet safety for kids indeed involves continually learning about all these factors and keeping yourself updated at all times.

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But the problem starts when kids and teens starts using their cell phone excessively without control, to the point of becoming addicted to it. What’s more? now with the advanced capabilities built into the mobile phones thanks to the latest technology, besides calls and text messaging sharing of photos and videos is a breeze. As they are internet enabled accessing the social networking sites is also made very convenient. Many kids and teens end up getting involved in sexting even.

As a parent you obviously cannot and should not deny your children the use of cell phones completely but what do you do in the current scenario? Read on to find out…

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Definition & Background

Many kids and teens today have their own mobile phones to use for social, family, and professional purposes.  Mobile phones are equipped to send/receive phone calls and text messages.  ”Smart” phones or PDAs and other devices also enable you to access the Internet, take/send photos/videos, play games, listen to music, use a calculator, alarm clock, and calendar, not to mention the thousands of apps that offer a growing array of services.

Text messaging has many functions, even those with a typical 160 character limit.  By sending one text message to your Twitter account, you can immediately update all of your followers (those who have elected to receive mobile updates).  Or, you can vote on your favorite American Idol.  You can also send a text message to GOOGL (56656) with search queries, such as looking up the definition of a word.

Many teens use a mobile phone as a part of a family plan, where the bill is sent to one person in a household or family.  However, teens are able to procure their own mobile phones without committing to a contract by purchasing a prepaid phone.

The function of mobile phones in our lives is likely to keep expanding, as mobile phone companies are looking to sell more goods and services through the phone, where the buyer would pay for the goods along with the monthly mobile phone bill.

Data & Research

Teenagers have previously lagged behind adults in their ownership of mobile phones, but several years of survey data collected by the Pew Internet & American Life Project show that those ages 12-17 are closing the gap in mobile phone ownership.  The Project first began surveying teenagers about their mobile phones in its 2004 Teens and Parents project when a survey showed that 45% of teens had a mobile phone.  Since that time, mobile phone use has climbed steadily among teens ages 12 to 17 – to 63% in fall of 2006 to 71% in early 2008.

In comparison, 77% of all adults (and 88% of parents) had a mobile phone or other mobile device at a similar point in 2008.  mobile phone ownership among adults has since risen to 85%, based on the results of our most recent tracking survey of adults conducted in April 2009. [1]

The mobile phone has become a primary mode of socializing for teens and they will often avoid contact with peers that don’t have mobile phones, according to a study by Context. [2]

And almost everyone, including those whom the Context study considers moderate cell-phone users, felt anxious during the “deprivation” phase of the study that required them to give up their phones for a few days.

Harmful Effects

Mobile phone use has several potential costs: financial, academic, social, and health.

Aside from using more minutes than allocated in your mobile phone plan, extra text messages (both sent and received) can quickly add to your bill.

Some schools limit or restrict the use of mobile phones.  Schools set restrictions because of the use of mobile phones for cheating on tests, harassing other people, causing threats to the schools security, and facilitating gossip and other social activity in school.

Some teens text message so much (200+ texts/day) that they have developed physical symptoms, Texting Teen Tendonitis (TTT).  So much texting can lead to pain in the hands, back and neck soreness from poor posture while texting, impaired vision, and, possibly, many years down the line, to arthritis. [3]

One study found that teenagers who excessively use their mobile phone are more prone to disrupted sleep, restlessness, stress and fatigue. [4] Another found that mobile phone addiction can result in psychological disorders. [5]

Because mobile phones emit electromagnetic radiation, concerns have been raised about cancer risks that may pose when used for long periods of time.  The current consensus view of the scientific and medical communities is that health effects are very unlikely to be caused by cellular phones or their base stations.  At the same time, cellular phones became widely available only relatively recently, while tumors can take decades to develop.  For this reason, some health authorities have urged that the precautionary principle be observed, recommending that use and proximity to the head be minimized, especially by children. [6]

Recognizing if Cellphone Addiction Has Become a Problem

Parents and their teens need to negotiate what is an acceptable amount of time and money spent on mobile phones.  When a parent gives their child a mobile phone, there is usually a monthly plan that provides a structure for how many day time minutes and text messages are available.  If a parent is paying the bill, they have access to the mobile phone records, which tracks how often teens call and send messages, and to what numbers.  Teens should know that parents have access to this information, and know their parents’ expectations for acceptable use.

While the mobile phone bill provides some information about mobile phone use, other factors effect teens’ experiences on the phone.  Because researchers continue to study the harmful effects of mobile phone use, it’s not always clear when a symptom can be traced to the mobile phone.  A teen could become depressed, for example, for a number of reasons.  The best way to recognize if mobile phones have caused any problems in your teen’s life is to speak openly.

What to do if You Discover a Problem?

Mobile phones have an important function in many people’s daily lives and it’s hard for us to imagine curtailing our dependence on them.  Therefore, it might not be advisable to ban your child’s mobile phone, which could lead to social isolation.  The goal is to establish healthy habits.  Time spent on mobile phones, while useful and fun, is time not spent focusing on other important activities, such as studying, working, and improving mental and physical health.

It’s important to recognize that although mobile phones provide us with the ability to seek social contact and feedback at any hour of the day, it might be a worthwhile idea to spend time “offline” and to realize that our time might be well spent alone.  In the same vein, parents might rely too heavily on mobile phone to communicate with their children, contacting them too much, in the place of a face to face conversation.

If your teen is encountering problems from mobile phone use, a collaborative conversation about self-reliance and independence from socializing might lead them to seek activities that free their hands from their phones.  Ultimately, decreasing mobile phone use might actually be a relatively easy fix to problems.

Laws Protecting Your Child

Some states outlaw using mobile phones while driving.

Most recently, New York City passed a law that fines people whose mobile phones ring in “places of public performance.” [7]

Law enforcement and intelligence services in the UK and the US possess technology to remotely activate the microphones in mobile phones in order to listen to conversations that take place nearby the person who holds the phone.

References

1. “Teens and Mobile Phones Data Memeo“, pewinternet.org (Aug. 19, 2009)
2. “She’s Gotta Have It: mobile phone“, wired.com (May 16, 2003)
3. “Many Young People Suffer from ‘Teen Texting Tendonitis’“, associatedcontent.com (Jul. 22, 2009)
4. “Excessive Mobile Phone Use Affects Sleep In Teens, Study Finds“, sciencedaily.com (Jun. 9, 2008)
5. “Mobile-phone addiction in teenagers may cause severe psychological disorders“, news-medical.net (Feb. 27, 2007)
6. “Mobile Phone: Privacy“, wikipedia.org
7. “She’s Gotta Have It: Cell phone“, wired.com (May 16, 2003)

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Knowledge is indeed power and now that you know the above you are in a much better position involving your children and their cell phone use. Just as mobile phones has become a necessary part of our lives and so is the case for our children too, hence cutting it out of their life is out of question and certainly not a wise thing to do. Ultimately it’s all about managing it and the more you know about the current trend and what’s happening surrounding kids safety issues, the better position you’ll be in to handle it.

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Unless they are guided properly we can well imagine how they risky this can be. Kids naturally have less control over their desires and hence their spendings can go out of control easily. Besides this, they can end up revealing too much sensitive information online while shopping and hence putting themselves and the whole family at risks.

Hence this becomes one of the issues surrounding internet safety for kids today, which you as a parent need to know more about. Presented below a detailed study into kids and online commerce, the harmful effects and the risks, and important tips for safety.

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Definition & Background

Kids and Online Commerce refers to any situation where children make monetary transactions online.  This includes purchasing items off Craigslist.com (which may not require a bank account), selling or auctioning items, using a credit or debit card to buy items from online sellers or retailers, and participating in online sites requiring payment (including gambling websites).  In order to shop online, one must have access to a computer and either a bank account, online payment account, debit card, or credit card.

By law, one must be at least 18 years old to have his or her own credit card.  However, those under 18 can be added as a user to an adult’s account.  PayPal offers a service to enable teens to have their own accounts under adult supervision as well.

Online Banking is another facet of e-commerce, enabling simplified access between accounts, the ability to manage investment portfolios (which rarely applies to children) and visibility into most non-cash monetary transactions.

Data & Research

According to a report entitled “The Teens Market in the U.S.” teen shopping grows by approximately 3.5% annually and is forecast to climb to $91.1 billion in 2011. [1]

WeeWorld, a popular avatar video game, conducted a survey and found that “when it comes to spending online, 34% of teens are willing to spend online for ‘anything fun’ while 22% will spend online in order to express themselves. Girls are generally more interested in buying goods online to express themselves, 24% as opposed to 17% of boys.” [2]

Market researchers conduct studies on the buying habits of kids and teens. ClickZ, a website made for digital marketers, also provides information and statistics about online commerce.

Similarities & Differences to Offline Behavior

Kids and young adults are heavily targeted by marketers and often seek to purchase toys and objects they perceive to be important to their personal and social development.  Online marketing can be narrowly targeted, and thus be more effective.  Search engines and online vendors will remember prior purchases, or simply what one has searched for.

The primary difference between buying something online and from a paper catalog is the ease of use and the threat of identity theft, which can quickly lead to a weakened credit score and.  Making purchases online can be quick and easy because software, online stores, and PayPal save credit card and billing information.  Whereas prior to online commerce, a child could sneak a twenty dollar bill out of a parent’s wallet when no one was looking, today a child can memorize credit card information and use it without being asked for identification.

In addition to now being able to buy everything online that one previously bought offline, there are a number of items sold online that do not exist offline, thus increasing the number of ways youth can spend money.  These items include domain names (eg. yourname.com), membership to video game sites (e.g. Club Penguin), access to premium content on a website, and virtual goods (e.g. many social networks and online games allow you to buy enhancements, customizations, and virtual gifts).  Prescription drugs can also be more easily purchased online, as a prescription is often not necessarily required if sold through an international pharmacy.

Just as it makes purchasing easier, the Internet also facilitates the act of selling, which can foster both productive and unproductive behavior.  It’s as easy for a teen (perhaps even easier) to navigate eBay.com, Etsy.com, or Craigslist.org as it is for their parents.  Children might be encouraged to develop entrepreneurial skills, even selling goods or services from their own websites.  Other ways kids and teens might make money online include gold mining (obtaining and selling virtual weapons and currency in video games), selling advertisement space on blogs, or as a creative twist, using YouTube to help sell Girl Scout cookies. [3]

Harmful Effects

The most harmful effects with regard to online commerce are overspending, getting scammed, damaging the card holder’s credit score, and breaking the law by purchasing prohibited items.

One example of online fraud is phishing: the criminally fraudulent process of attempting to acquire sensitive information such as usernames, passwords and credit card details by masquerading as a trustworthy entity in an electronic communication.  Some laws are easily transgressed online, such as lying about one’s age to gain access to a site, using someone else’s credit card, and illegally downloading music, movies, or software.

E-commerce also opens opportunities for kids to communicate with and meet strangers.

Recognizing the Abuse of Online Commerce

How each family discusses managing money is a personal decision, but those conversations should address issues specific to the Internet.  Familiar problems like overspending are joined by new ones like identity theft and Internet scams.  Parents should stay abreast of topics as they arise in the news and in the lives of their children.

In the case of illegal downloading, Internet service providers might contact the account holder if they have been alerted that illegal file sharing has occurred.

Tips for Safe Online Commerce

• Be vigilant for unauthorized credit card use and identity theft by regularly checking bills and credit scores.
• Where possible, use a secure online payment service like PayPal or WorldPay.
• Use credit cards rather than debit cards.
• Don’t keep your personal or financial information (including account passwords) on your computer; use a removable storage devices, such as a USB stick.
• Don’t give out personal or financial information to vendors over the phone, through the mail, or online, unless you are absolutely certain your contact is legitimate.
• Try to make all of your online transactions with one credit card.
• Keep a record of what you pay for and always check your online purchases against your credit card statement(s).
• Always check the privacy policy of any website that requests personal details.  If the website is requesting this type of information and does not have a privacy policy, it is not wise to submit your information.
• When submitting information online, make sure there is a “lock” icon on the browser’s status bar (and that it is “locked”); this tells you that the site is secured.
• Keep your operating system, anti-virus, anti-spyware and firewall software up-to-date. [4]

Laws that Help

• Ryan Haight Online Pharmacy Consumer Protection Act of 2008
• Controlled Substances Act

References

1. “ECommerce-Guide Essentials“, ecommerce-guide.com.
2. “WeeWorld Survey Says Teen Spending On The Rise“, virtualgoodsnews.com (Jul. 7, 2009).
3. “The Girls Scouts Are Old School – Stop Cyber Cookie Promoting“, babble.com (Mar. 13, 2009).
4. “Information on personal information safety“, wiredsafety.org
5. “Controlled Substances Act“, wikipedia.org

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Now that you know much more about kids and online commerce you’ll be clear on what precautions to take as and when you go for an account along with your kid. Not only that now you are in a far better position to even guide your friends and your near and dear ones on the same issue. Ensuring internet safety for kids involves some immediate action and the learning continues thereon.

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With the capability which comes with the latest cell phones and hand held devices now sexting is in the form of electronic messages, photos and videos. This has become a growing trend among kids and teens around the world. Sexting is a very risky behavior actually as it can potentially ruin your child’s reputation and spoil his or her future.

Learn more about sexting and what you should do should you discover your child is involved in situations involving sexting. This also happens to be one of the important issues surrounding internet safety for kids.

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Definition & Background

“Sexting” is a relatively new term used for the act of sending a sexually suggestive or explicit text message (AKA texting, SMS, MMS) to someone else.  In most instances, the intended recipient is a current or prospective boyfriend or girlfriend.  These messages may vary from simple text, to photos, or even short videos sent from a mobile phone to either another phone and/or email account.

References to sexting in mainstream society only date back to 2006.  It is a newer concept that appears to be directly correlated with the emergence of faster mobile networks, more sophisticated phones (with photo and video cameras and different messaging options), and the increasing availability of these networks and devices to teens.

Sexting Statistics

Like many emerging threats to online safety and child safety, reports vary about the proliferation and severity of texting.  However, it is hard to dispute that the problem exists and that the consequences can be dangerous.  A report done by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy in 2008 surveyed 1,280 teens and young adults.  Their research found that 75% of teens and 71% of young adults believe that sending sexually suggestive content “can have serious negative consequences.”  Despite that, 39% of teens and 59% of young adults have sent or posted sexually suggestive emails or text messages, and 20% of teens and 33% of young adults have sent/posted nude or semi-nude images of themselves.  Perhaps more disturbing was the study’s finding that ~38% teens and ~46% of young adults say it is common for nude or semi-nude photos to get shared with people other than the intended recipient.[1]

Similarities & Differences to Offline Behavior

A common thread in many threats facing online teens these days is that the behaviors creating the threats are not new, but the manner in which these behaviors are manifested are.  While a precocious teen in the 1980s might have sent a provocative note or photograph to their boyfriend or girlfriend, today’s teen uses mobile devices, social networks, and email to share such content.  These channels make it easy to share, reproduce, and forward such content to unintended recipients.  Even worse, unlike their counterpart of 20 years ago, today’s teen must cope with the fact that behaviors such as sexting can not only have serious safety and legal repercussions, but may also leave a permanent record.

Harmful Effects

A shared sexting message could have disastrous consequences.  For starters, the impact of such content getting “leaked” could result in social isolation from friends, bullying, and unwelcome sexual solicitations.  Further, in cases where such content might have been shared as the result of revenge, it could certainly lead to violence.  Aside from issues reputation and social issues, sending, receiving, and/or sharing this type of content could lead to disciplinary action by schools, employers, and possibly even state and federal law enforcement. Most importantly, what might start out as a fleeting and thoughtless lapse of judgement could lead to serious emotional and self-esteem issues for any child or young adult.

Recognizing if Sexting has Become a Problem With Your Teen

Short of concrete evidence (or concerns voiced by your teen, their friends, their teachers, or law enforcement officials), the best way of recognizing any problems with your child is to communicate with them.  Knowing what your child is up to and paying attention to their moods and behavior is essential.  A parent con usually tell (“sense”) when something is amiss.  If the lines of communication are already open, then exploring what may be wrong will be an easier conversation.  Some common signs might include mood swings, changes in weight and appetite, lapses in personal hygiene, or a new found fascination with morbid or offbeat topics or entertainment.  These, of course, are common examples, but each child may react differently.  Just remember that communication with your child is essential and can help prevent a potential problem or mitigate the damage of a problem that has already started.

What to do if you Discover Your Child is Involved in a Situation Involving Sexting

While it is often easier said than done, controlling your emotions is essential.  While situations involving sexting can vary tremendously in terms of the harm that they can cause, it is hard to imagine a scenario where a parent would not be very upset to learn of their child’s involvement in such a case.  Despite a parent’s anger, fear, concern (or all of the above), remember that communication will be required in order to address the issue.  If a child feels further threatened or isolated by their parents in such a situation, they may be much less likely to share further details about the situation out of fear of further reprisal.

In any situation that presents a potential threat to the safety and health of anyone involved, a parent should immediately contact the appropriate medical and law enforcement officials in their area.  If the nature of the threat is less severe, then recruiting the support of key advisors, family members, friends, coaches, teachers, etc. might be a good place to start.  Also, depending on the situation, you might find it appropriate to discuss the situation with any other parents or parties involved.

Again, it is imperative to understand that you are the parent and that this is a time when your child will be coming to you for guidance and support.  Whether your child is the victim or the victimizer, it is incumbent on you to communicate with your child, assess the situation, and select a course of action that mitigates the potential for immediate and long-term damage to the safety and well-being of all parties involved.

Laws That Help

Because technology tends to move faster than the laws that govern it, there has not been a lot of legal precedent set in this area as of late 2009.  Further, and as you might expect, local laws vary greatly depending on the social and political culture of a given geography or state.  For example, Vermont lawmakers recently introduced a bill that legalized the consentual exchange of graphic content between teens aged 13-18.  However, they made it illegal to share such content with an unintended recipient.[2] In Ohio, a new law was recently proposed that would reduce sexting-related crimes from a felony charge to a misdemeanor.  This would prevent teens from potentially be labeled ’sex offenders’.[3] Like Ohio, Utah also recently reduced such crimes to a misdemeanor.[4]

References

1. “Sex and Tech (PDF)” The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. (12-10-2008).
2. “Vermont Considers Legalizing Teen ‘Sexting’” , Associated Press (Apr. 13, 2009).
3. “Ohio to address ’sexting’ laws“, WKYC-TV (Apr. 13, 2009).
4. “Utah lawmakers OK bill on ’sexting’“, Associated Press (Mar. 11, 2009).

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In today’s world where cell phones and mobile technology is within easy reach of children sexting has become one of the major issues of concern for all parents. The above presented studies, research and statistics reveals a growing trend and concern among children today. Again the first requirement in tackling any issues is to first have a thorough understanding of the issues involved. For parents who has taken the step to safeguard their children SafetyWeb provides the means to keep a track on their activities. For parental control at the PC level SentryPC is one of the most reliable solution.

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What they of course don’t know is that their ‘interesting’ friend at the other end might well be a fifty years old man or woman. Online predators frequents the social networking sites in search of such innocent kids whom they’ll approach for friendship taking on the identity of someone in their age group. All this presents a direct threat to kids online.

Unless guided in the proper way kids wouldn’t know the dangers of meeting people online. It is very important that first you as a parent must know everything about online friends and the social networking activities of kids. To drive home the importance of internet safety for kids here’s the lesson on online friends and how to help your child go about it.

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Definition & Background

The Internet makes information easily transmittable amongst both strangers and acquaintances for business, educational, and social purposes.  In the earliest days of the Internet, affinity groups quickly formed around common interests; the ability to communicate with others in the group was made possible through message boards, chat rooms, and newsletters.

Soon after, Social Networks (many consider Friendster to be the original) were created to enable real life friends to share information and interact on the Internet, and potentially to expand personal networks through mutual friends.  However, the need for actual friendship or even a common friend was soon trumped by the perceived prestige of having a large online community, resulting in the tendency for people to become “friends” with people they had never met.

The term Online Friends can be used to describe the presence of a real life friend in one’s virtual (online) community, or to describe people who interact online but who may not have met in person.  It’s common for social networking sites to facilitate “friending” – the act of becoming part of one’s online network – through searches or browsing of other community members.  While most social networking websites require that online friendships be mutually agreed upon – that is, the sites are set up so that one person requests the friendship and the other approves it – it is not uncommon to receive friend requests from complete strangers.

It is possible that Online Friends never interact, as having the illusion of a large friend network is all that some people seek.  However, that does not necessarily mean it’s a harmless situation.  When people allow others into their online community, they are giving them access to personal information which may including photos, videos, schools, hobbies and details such as their address or phone number.  With all of this information, an immoral person would be armed to do tremendous harm.

A reference to one’s Online Friend can represent a variety of realities:

• “Suzy from school is my friend on facebook.”
• “ilovebacon2 is my friend from the online game site; we’ve never met in person but ‘talk’ and play cards every week.”
• “I received four friend requests today from people I’ve never met.”

It is wise to not make assumptions that Online Friends are all good or all bad.  If you are curious about the origin of your child’s online friendship, it is best to ask.

Data & Research

As participation in online communities has become more common, so has contact and solicitation by strangers.  The National Center for Missing & Exploited Children and Cox Communications reported that over 60% of teens had established a presence on social networking web pages where they shared photos and personal information.  While these actions may seem harmless in a secure environment, the following statistics reveal that security and privacy are not the status quo.

• 71% of respondents reported receiving messages online from someone they didn’t know
• 45% of respondents have been asked for personal information by someone they didn’t know
• 30% of respondents have considered meeting someone that they’ve only talked to online
• 14% of respondents have actually met a person they’ve only spoken to over the Internet (9% of 13-15s; 22% of 16-17s)
• Nearly half of respondents who received online messages from someone they didn’t know, reported that they’ll usually reply and chat with that person. [1]

Surprising Differences to Offline Behavior

Even prior to the Internet it was observed that people feel safer using written messages than they do using the telephone or speaking in person. Studies have shown that people are more willing to type secrets into a computer than they are to tell them out-loud to somebody. This sentiment – and practice – has become more prevalent as communicating through the Internet has replaced interpersonal interaction. In a study of 16,000 MySpace users between the ages of 14 and 21, over a third of respondents revealed that they find it easier to talk to online buddies than to people out in the “real world”.  Respondents reported feeling closer to their Online Friends than offline ones, since they had much more frequent contact and more insight into each other’s lives.  Thus, it can be extrapolated that the ease of sharing information enabled by technology, and the candor generated by using the Internet as a medium, results in people sharing more with an Online Friend who they don’t know well than they would if they interacted with this individual in person. [2]

While this would not be a problem if one’s online friends were in fact people they knew outside the Internet, we know this is not the case.  Even more harmful is the fact that the sharing of personal information can be further exaggerated with Online Friends who began as online strangers.  While there may be a sense of friendship or trust with one’s new Online Friend, the use of written communication, and the fact that they have not met in person act as a ‘protective’ shield, opening the door for more candid dialogue.  It is through this frank dialogue that strangers can extract personal information from an unwitting new Online Friend.

Harmful Effects

While the practice of engaging in and maintaining friendships online shouldn’t yield harm, the reality can be much different.  Firstly, even if one only engages with “real world” friends, simply having a presence on these Online Social Networking sites puts their personal information on the Internet.  While one can try to control the information they share with others, they cannot control information or potentially damaging content such as photos or videos posted to the Internet by other people.  Additionally, the ability to ‘tag’ content – to label it with the names of the individuals in it – can draw a straight line back to an individual.  It can sometimes seem impossible to prevent others from sharing one’s name or image.

It has also been widely argued that the rampant use of technology as a communication medium between friends is resulting in poor interpersonal skills and less developed writing skills. [3]

Helping Children Manage Their Online Friends

It would be nearly impossible (and ill-advised) to try and keep your child off of Social Networking sites (or anything similar that may emerge) and to prevent them from interacting with their friends through the Internet.  Therefore, educating your child about potential risks, and how to safely manage their online image and privacy, seems to be the better approach.  The following recommended steps can help with keeping your children safe online:

• Speak with your child and find out which Social Networks they are part of, or want to be part of.
• Find out which Social Networks their friends are part of.
• Ask them who their Online Friends are, and how they know them.
• Ask if you might be part of their Online Network.  In addition to giving you first-hand insight into the information they are posting about themselves and information and content posted by others, you will be able to understand the dynamics of the particular site and to see how common it is to be contacted by strangers online.
• With younger children – particularly ones who are curious to begin interacting with their friends online – you may require that they let you co-manage their Online Network and consult with you prior to adding new friends to their network.
• Remind your children that they cannot fully control their online image, but they can take preventative steps by controlling who they directly share information with.
• Help your children navigate the security settings on their Social Networks, and encourage them to minimize the amount of information they make publicly available.
• Advise your children to not enter chat rooms, or to engage in any conversations over the Internet with people they don’t know, regardless of how harmless it might seem.

References

1. “Teen Internet Safety Survey” National Center for Missing & Exploited Children and Cox Communications, 2006. Retrieved 11-16-2009
2. “Your “Real” Friends are Your Online Friends” Sarah Perez, ReadWriteWeb, August 10, 2009. Retrieved 11-16-2009
3. “Study Shows Online Social Networking Could Hurt Social Skills” Luke Dimik, CentralMichiganLife, November 13, 2009.

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There is no doubt that all parents serious about protecting their kids online (and which parents wouldn’t be?) must know about what kids are doing online at the social networking sites with particular focus on their online friends and the dangers of meeting people online. And all parents must continually keep themselves up to date about the latest developments and happenings. And the only way parents can keep a track of the activities and whereabouts of their kids online is by using the kind of services provided by SafetyWeb.

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